Saturday, October 30, 2021

My happy place and giving up on being a YouTuber

Recently I've discovered a new happy place. What I mean by "happy place" is basically some sort of ritual that I do either every day, or nearly every day, or even just now and then that I derive great pleasure from.

In the past I'd come home after a long day and watch any variety of shows... Seinfeld while drinking Arizona RX tall boys (and a Linden's chocolate chip cookie) from the deli across the street from my old apartment... Watching "How I Met You Mother" while decompressing after a long and stressful day at work (I actually despise that show, yet kept watching anyway until I finished the series)... I used to watch Sabrina the Teenage Witch reruns from like 3 until 4 AM before I would work on a computer application and then go skateboarding at a local park.... What else? Fran Drescher and The Nanny every night for at least an hour... but now? I'm onto bigger and better things.

Lately I've been returning home, wherein I will fire up Microsoft's Solitaire Collection a.k.a. Klondike for some reason... and watch reruns of Fear Factor, which airs on the TBD channel for at least two hours every night. Editor's Note: I've beaten Klondike on the Expert difficulty. Struggling to beat it on Grand Master as of now.

As for Fear Factor, I just enjoy the fact it's structured and I don't know the results of any of the challenges, since I've retained zero information from watching it when it initially aired. Come to think of it, the same logic applied to The Nanny. I watched re-runs of that and didn't remember a single story-line or plot from when I used to watch reruns of it literally everyday after school, somewhere around 2003 I'd imagine.

There are other happy places from the past, which usually involve at least two components. I used to go to a specific Chinese restaurant in Manhattan (Tang's Garden), but only when it was raining, and every time I'd bring a specific book with me (Petronius' Satyrica) to read. Other rituals include visiting a Dunkin Donuts Drive-Thru every time I logged a 12-hour shift at the postal plant, usually close to midnight, I could go on and on...

In other news, I also have started to ONLY drink decaf coffee... and the occasional cup of Matcha Tea (which according to the box, has about 30% the caffeine of one cup of coffee, which is plenty for me), prepared following along with the YouTuber Kashi Star. I think my long hiatus from coffee may have had a larger effect on me. I've noticed that drinking a full cup of coffee makes me feel wiped out, fatigued, and basically sick afterwards. It's like I developed a quasi-allergic reaction to coffee as a result of abstaining from it for so long. I guess my body had built up a tolerance, and when the tolerance was completely wiped away, my body's reaction changed into basically rejecting it. I am enjoying the Matcha tea, though, for sure.

To conclude this update... I've officially accepted defeat. I will never become a famous YouTuber. I'm officially shutting down my Mind of Mike channel as of now.  I can't keep up with how intense it really is to become a YouTuber. Not to mention, anything you can think of or imagine... someone else has already posted a YouTube video about it... so you start to ask yourself... "What am I doing this for? What's the point?"

To become a bonafide YouTuber... Not only do you have to put yourself out there completely, editing video is excruciating for someone like me who has pretty much the most basic skills you could have with it. Not to mention, churning out videos while maintaining any normal occupation is pretty much impossible. If you're going to be a famous YouTuber, you can't really have any other distractions whatsoever. At least that's my take.

I've happily demoted myself to the world of blogging and music.

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